yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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