nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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