he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Randomize
