Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
