She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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