i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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