You just made me feel so damn special
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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