Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
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