i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
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And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
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would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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