Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
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