I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
So vagazzling was a success
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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