i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Randomize
