i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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