This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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