do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
He did a backflip because drugs
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