i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Randomize
