Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
