College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
