I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
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