We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize
