so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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