Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
