just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
