she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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