my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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