gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
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