they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
