Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
So squirting runs in the family.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
