so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Randomize