I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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