Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
