ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
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