Are we in a gay sports bar?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
