then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
My pussy is not your playground.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize