i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
