New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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