another moral hangover. fuck.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
