The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
