garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
