the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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