Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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