Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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