Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
