Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(404): View more from Georgia

A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds

(404): View more from Georgia

She started it, but I totally finished it.

Fav 6 3851 910
share tweet
(479): View more from Arkansas

Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.

Fav 13 886 3341
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(403): View more from Alberta, CA

and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants

Fav 32 4600 823
share tweet
(304): View more from West Virginia

yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.

Fav 13 6275 1231
share tweet
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(908): View more from New Jersey

I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head

Fav 12 5147 1949
share tweet
(423): View more from Tennessee

I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.

Fav 10 3281 1384
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(804): View more from Virginia

of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.

Fav 2 1720 834
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(717): View more from Pennsylvania

So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.

Fav 2 735 446
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(540): View more from Virginia

I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.

Fav 0 51 4
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT