So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
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He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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