we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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