Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
