You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
He felt like a one man threesome
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
