i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Randomize
