im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize